This story really IS true

It's been suggested by certain people whom we won't name (cousin Chris) that the scrapblog editor sometimes embellishes the 100 percent true stories she makes up with fictional tidbits, mostly because her memory is a dewy and nostalgic veil addled by years of drinking Tab cola and working at newspapers. This next story is not one of those dubious tales, though. This one really happened, and just yesterday! The scrapblog editor was sitting in a lawn chair in her Robbinsdale yard with her geriatric cat Lucille when she heard someone call out, "Hey!" Sounded like a teenage boy whose voice was changing. She looked around. No boy. "Hey!" she heard again. Yikes! The greeting was coming from a crow sitting in her ash tree. "Hey! Hey!" It was an absolutely humanlike voice. Holy schmoly! Pam and Lucille were spooked. They did not return the crow's greeting. (Of course, Lucy can't talk except on Christmas Eve, when the animals talk, right, Noah?) Then, at work, she saw this story about crows on the news budget for today's paper. Gadzooks! As Uncle Joe says, "The crows and coyotes will be here when we're gone."